A crazy last couple days in Haiti.... and an stressful yet amazing return home!

I know many of you enjoy reading the blog and getting updates on our journey...  Sorry to be MIA but after reading this post you will understand why!! Be prepared, this is going to be a long post but the end might be the best part!

First of all, we had no internet access Sunday through Tuesday morning so writing posts about Sunday and Monday was impossible, lets start there.

Sunday was Mother's Day in the USA!  I have enjoyed every Mother's Day since becoming a mom.  We usually enjoy a hike, a BBQ with family or something like that.  I enjoy never cooking or cleaning on Mother's Day.  Today (I'm pretending its still Sunday!) was no different in the sense that it was one of the best Mother's Days I've ever had... I had all 3 of my kids together!!!  I have prayed the last 4 Mother's Days that I would be able to meet our son and now that I have I prayed this Mother's Day that this will be last Mother's Day with my son in Haiti! Mother's Day in Haiti is May 30th... does that mean I get 2 days to celebrate this year since I have a child(ren) in each country! LOL!


Sunday ("today" still pretending its Sunday)
R talked so much!  The last few days of our last trip in November we got him to repeat some words in English ("i love you", "where are you", "mama", "daddy', etc...).  We weren't sure we would get back to that point since our trip was so much shorter this time.  It was amazing and warmed my heart that he was talking so much today! He know calls Ethan "Papa Daddy"  and it is SO CUTE! He was also waving today for the first time.  The girls and I were on the third floor and Ethan was down in the yard and he started yelling "Papa Daddy" and waving unprompted!  Brought tears to my eyes!

Today the girls started getting a little overwhelmed by all the kids at the creche.  I am going to admit it is even a little overwhelming for me, especially on Saturday and Sunday.  For those of you who haven't been to a creche or orphanage, and more specifically those who haven't been to ours directly,  image 130 kids (approximately) who have a lot of freedom, very little adult interaction, rarely get to play with toys, and all with different personalities running around, pulling on you, wanting to sit on your lap and hold your hand, etc... The girls kinda had enough and were tired about half way through the day. We "kicked off" the majority of the kids from the balcony.  There are a few we have become close with and who are not quite as overwhelming that we let stay.  There also is another family visiting their children (who are older 11 and 13), we didn't want to kick their friends off for obviously reasons but the older kids are not as overwhelming and not as high energy.  It once again has been so nice getting to meet in person another family going through the process along side of us!  We have "met" through an online group many of the families adopting through our creche and these families seem like family to us... it feels so good to connect in person and meet them face to face!  Nobody knows exactly what this process feels like other than people who have lived it as well.  We have discovered that even people who have adopted from other countries and the US just don't understand the Haiti specific adoption challenges, just like we don't understand their process completely either.
We do not discount and we are thankful for all the support back home, but this is a different kind of support that we need!

One last thing for today... we have always said we will try and visit again when we get our adoption decree.  Once we have our adoption decree, if we visit, we can take R away from the creche.  We can take him to our guesthouse or hotel, wherever we plan to stay and take him back to the creche before we return home.  We have always looked forward to that visit.  Today we decided that if we visit after our decree we will not take him away from the creche, we will not take him away until we don't have to return. Why did we decide this? We made this decision today based on his age and his reaction to when we leave each day.  If he were older and we could explain the process to him better we would.  If we could explain to him "we have to take you back to the creche but next time we don't have to, next time we get to take you home" we would bring him to wherever we stay.  But, since he is so young and already struggles with abandonment concerns, we have decided this wouldn't be in his best interest.  When we go to pick him up for the last time and bring him home, we don't ever want him to wonder when we have to take him back to the creche like we did the last time. This decision makes me sad but also makes me feel better to think, its the best decision for him.

                                                     

Monday-
Today was very calm and quiet.  Most the kids were at school (we asked them not to take R to school Monday or Tuesday so we can maximize our time with him) and we only had a couple kids on the balcony with us.

Today we brought a hot wheels track with us... he LOVED it!!  We didn't take it over the weekend because when all the kids are around things mysteriously disappear. We didn't want the hot wheels to disappear because somehow we only brought one car.  Also we planned on bringing the track home with us.  Most (actaully all to this point) the toys we leave at the creche the last day but we want him to enjoy the hot wheels track at home, and it wasn't cheap. This little guy is all boy when it comes to cars, bulldozers and trucks!



Today we spent time talking to talking to R's nanny with the help of our translator (side note: our translator this time has been amazing! His English as been outstanding and he has been so good with the girls, and helping the girls talk to their brother.  He gets down on his knees to be at their level and is so caring!). After talking to his nanny, we feel like we know him better.  We asked a lot of questions regarding his schedule and personality when we are not around.  She said he is much shyer with us than the other kids. Some of the other things she said (which I am choosing not to share right now because they are his story and some of his story is just that, his story) makes a lot of sense!  Some of the traits and characteristics we have observed make a lot sense and are inline with what she shared with us about it him.


Today goodbyes for the day were a little easier... only because he was fast asleep.  This little guy gets so tired by the afternoon.  Today about 10 minutes before we were going to leave Ethan was holding him and cuddling a little... all of a sudden I looked down and he was asleep... we didn't even realize he had fallen asleep! lol!!!  The first and only day Evaleena hasn't cried leaving for the afternoon.

Upon returning to the hotel, the girls wanted to swim just like they have ever other day.  I told Ethan we need a pool (lol!)... it is amazing how much the girls improved on their swimming skills being able to swim everyday.   Adrianna went from not wanting to take off her life jacket on day one (she could touch in the majority of the pool) to completely swimming.

Right after this video she started diving down, touching daddy's foot and then swimming back to the edge. 

Tuesday-
Our last day with R at the creche. Last days are never easy, even the drive out there is hard because (at least for me) I have a little anxiety to make sure the day is perfect! I can honestly say our day at the creche was close to perfect.  Today is much cooler and the wind was strong which felt so good.  The cooler day gave us a lot more energy to run around and play.   We spent the majority of the morning running around the yard.  There is a play structure at the creche but it is always too hot, usually you cannot even touch the slide without burning yourself. Today we were able to fully enjoy the slide, one of R's favorite activities.

Another fun activity for the kids was cockroach hunting... you read that correct, yes! LOL!!  On the side of the building is a large empty plastic barrel.  Just like the ones they use for water, I think its just an extra.  Anyway Ethan moved it a little because the kids wanted to find spiders... instead of spiders we have dozen of cockroaches. The kids thought is was hilarious it move the barrel and watch the roachs scurry around and go back under it... then they decided trying to step on them was even more fun.  I have a great video of them playing this "game" for a long time!  It brought a lot of fun and giggles into our day.

Today we wanted R to take a little nap before it got to close to the end of the day.  We didn't want to leave today with him asleep again since it was our last day.  I went up on the balcony while Ethan and the girls explored the property a little.  They walked down to check out the chicken coup, walked to explored the beautiful mango trees, chased a few turkeys, etc... while R napped in my arms.

Leaving today was hard, we knew it would be. Our translator said A LOT of rain was suppose to be arriving about the time we normally leave and he strongly suggested we leave early today.  With a lot of rain comes flooding in the streets and stopped traffic.  He wanted to get us back to where we were staying (about 30-45 minute drive normally) before the rain came otherwise we would be stuck in traffic for hours potentially. As we started packing up our stuff and backpacks and taking all our extra food and all the toys to the nannies, both girls started bawling. Even Adrianna who isn't quite as emotional as Evaleena was in complete tears leaving brother behind. Of course, this mommy started crying as soon as I saw both my girls crying.  R always knows when we are leaving... as soon as we start packing up our stuff he is instantly mute with no facial expressions, this doesn't make leaving on the last day any easier!

So, so much for leaving early to avoid traffic due to rain... So yesterday the Haitian government increase the price of gas by what is equivalent to almost $1. This is a significant amount for Haitians.  From what our translator explained, the government has been subsidizing fuel costs for the people and just decided not to do it anymore.  This apparently is very unpopular amongst the people.  When Haitians (and specifically one political group) are unhappy to government decisions they take to the streets in protest.  Well today we encountered one of those protests.   The protest blocked our usual route back "home".  These protests can last hours and we encountered to at the beginning so our driver and translator were trying to find a way "out", a different way to go.   Only problem was, everybody was trying to go this route.  We need to go over a river everyday and there was only one way to go. The road we had to take was very narrow, really only wide enough for 1 vehicle, but cars were trying to go both directions.  People who have been to Haiti before know exactly where this is leading... to sum it up... complete chaos.  We were at a complete stop for almost 30 minutes so our translator hoped out to see how far the traffic jam went.  He came back about 15 minutes later and we had moved about 5 car lengths.  He then proceeded to try and find a taptap (if you don't know what a taptap is, do a google search taptap and click on images!) on the other side of the chaos that would drive us directly to where we needed to go.  With not much luck, he decided to help direct traffic to get it moving so we can get out of the mess.  Our 30 minute drive was almost 3 hours!  Only positive about this experience was... it was so stressful that it took our minds off of leaving R behind.

By the time we had made it back, the rain had started... no swimming for the girls today.

                

Wednesday
Today hopefully will go down in the Carey Family record books as the worst day of travel ever!!!
At 3am I got woken up by Evaleena running to the bathroom and vomiting.  She started vomiting every 10-15 minutes and all I could do was pray to God that this was an episode of her Cyclical Vomiting Syndrome, which usually last about 4 hours, we boarded a plane and had 20 hours of travel to get home in 4 hours.  This time, my prayers weren't answered, God had something else in store for us.  Long story short... Evaleena vomited every 10-15 minutes for the next 8 hours and then every 20-45 minutes for the next 14 hours.  She vomited for 22 hours straight.  This poor girl literally crawled and rolled herself through the line in customs because she was too weak and sick to stand or even sit up. We contemplated having her and I stay in Ft Lauderdale while Adrianna and Ethan continued on home.  My concern was if she gave me whatever she had (not knowing what she was sick from or with), then I would be traveling sick and we would be stuck multiple days. Also, we just wanted to get home. On the plane from Ft Lauderdale to Phoenix she started to get very dehydrated, she started crying but had no tears... at this point I was envisioning her and I in an ER in Phoenix getting IV fluids.  I kept telling Ethan, if we can just get home!!  When we were almost to Phoenix, I finally got her to drink about 5 oz of water.  I said if she holds this down we will get home to Portland.  Thats when Adrianna vomited all over herself during our layover in Phoenix.  I felt so hopeless!  THANKFULLY that was the only time Adrianna vomited! But I did not sleep at all... I had really hoped to sleep that plane ride, at that point I had been awake for 20 hours straight but no such luck... every time I started to fall asleep I envisioned Adrianna getting sick all over both of us and the plane so I stayed awake ready with a bag, that thankfully wasn't needed! We made it home and got in bed about 1:30am.

THURSDAY-

Today our spirits were lifted!!!  As we woke up and the girls were recovering from being sick, we got an amazing phone call from our Haiti Program Director with our agency.
While we were in Haiti, we received our Authorization to Adopt Letter (aka Exit Letter).  This means that IBESR, the Haitian "social service agency", has officially said they approve us to adopt this child and we can move to the final stages of this adoption on the Haiti side.
We could not get the phone call while we were in Haiti but she called first thing this morning! This was a huge step in our adoption!!  We truly can say now we are on the uphill side and nearing the end of this adoption!!!  In 2-4 months we should have our adoption decree and per Haitian law he will be our child and have our last name!!  We can confidently say now, he should be home in 6-9 months so long as we have no major hiccups (which we do not see happening!).  Praying like crazy that he is home by Christmas or by the end of the year at least!!  Praying that 2017 is the last year he will call the creche home.  Praying ALL of 2018 is when he can say was the first full year he was in his forever home with his family!!!